Thursday, January 20, 2011

That feeling in the pit of your stomach

This is a really hard week for me. There have been tears nearly every day, and that usually also gives me headaches.

My best friend is leaving on a 5 month missions trip with YWAM. I'm totally excited for her and her wonderful husband. They are an amazing couple, and I know that God will enrich their lives and bless them beyond belief with this trip. I also know that anyone who comes into contact with them will be hugely blessed. I'm so ready to hear the amazing stories they will have to share from this adventure.

But for myself and my family, I'm sad. Josh and Kassi have become so much a part of our family. We've spent holidays with their families, we've spent birthdays and vacations together. When I need advise, Kassi and her mom are the first people I think of. Kas and I share so many little adventures in daily life. And my LittleFish adores them. It hurts to let them go, even for a limited time.

So I'm trying to let myself cry my tears and be sad, in remembrance that "My sadness does not harm others". I'm trying to not pretend everything is ok and shove the feelings deeper. I'm trying to not eat the pain away. And little by little, I know that the pain will subside, and though we will continue to miss them dearly, they will be back, and we will video chat with them in the meantime.

I wonder if they could possibly know how much we love them. How much I love them. How much Kassi is a sister of my heart. And loving people well means not being selfish with them. Because they are far too fabulous NOT to share with the world!

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